The Easter season is upon us and as I reflect upon my life, my many trials and few triumphs over the last year I find myself being frustrated at my very "humanness."

Do any of you feel this way?

I am reminded every morning of how very human I am when I try to get up out of my bed. This human body doesn't work the way it used to. The creaks and groans I have in my joints aren't what I picture myself having when I "am changed" at Christ's return.

If that's not bad enough, I am reminded once again how very human I am when I go to bed at night. My body aches for the want of rest, but if I dare get too much rest, it aches even more.

What about our body shape? I guess I am more shapely than most, because there's more of me pressed into curves at the bottom and at the top! That's certainly not how I picture myself as a radiant spiritual being.

It's not just physical limitations. Spiritual issues are what I long to change the most, such as the thoughts that come from somewhere in my brain. Woe is me! I cannot seem to make my brain think "good thoughts" the way I want it to!

I want to think good thoughts, those that are pure and just, but those good and pure thoughts often get sidetracked into ones slightly less pure. I long for the time when I will be nothing but good!

In reality my day-to-day actions aren't any better. It seems I am impatient when I really want to be patient, unkind when I want to be kind, hateful when I really want to be loving. Instead of returning good for evil, it's just the opposite with me.

It's like being on a diet and someone puts a huge slice of cheesecake smothered with luscious strawberries and whipped cream . . . no matter what you may tell yourself, the mouth takes over your mind, doesn't it?

I am reminded of the scriptures in Romans 7:14_25 where Paul states that he realizes that he is a creature of the flesh, sold into slavery of sin, not understanding his own actions, doing what is contrary to his desire. He also states that he realizes that it is not him that does the wicked deed, but the sin which dwells in him. He has the intention and urge to do what is right, but has no power to carry it out.

He found it to be a rule of action when he wanted to do what was right and good, the evil was ever present within him and he was subject to it. He delighted in the law of God but found himself to be at war against the law of his mind.

He states "O unhappy and pitiable and wretched man that I am! Who will release and deliver me from this body of death? I thank God! (He Will!) Through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then indeed I, of myself with the mind and heart serve the law of God but with the flesh the law of sin."

Unfortunately, these scriptures sum me up pretty well.

I fail many times and quite often. Yes, I find myself all too human, I'm afraid. I really long for the time when I will have a spiritual body and mind!

The struggle within myself-against myself-will cease. I need to remind myself that Christ loved me. He died for me. In spite of my humanness, and because of it. I find such joy at the realization of Christ's love for me.

So much so that I feel as Luke in Acts 20:24. However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me-the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.

And in Ephesians 2:4: But because of his great love for us, God who is rich in mercy made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions-it is by grace you have been saved!

Friends, no matter how human we feel, we can partake of the joy of the resurrection, the celebration of the bread and the wine, with the full realization that Christ loves us, in spite of our "humanness" and he died for us that we might be saved and spend eternity with Him!

Won't it be wonderful to rejoice and be happy with our Redeemer? We'll have a new body, a spirit filled "good" one, and no longer too human.

Hallelujah! He Lives!

Praise the Lord!

(And as my niece, Kelsy says, "Amen and Holy Good!")